Do Mothers Always Get The Decision-Making Rights Of The Kids?

Logan Smith
Logan Smith
10:00, Monday, 14 November, 2022
Do Mothers Always Get The Decision-Making Rights Of The Kids?

There was a presumption prevailing a few years back that women should always get the caretaker and decision-making right for a child after a divorce. However, the laws passed by several states have eradicated the notion of women being prioritized over men for a child's decision-making power. Just like women, men also go through emotional turmoil when facing separation and divorce, especially when a child is involved - so they get the right to raise their children too.

Despite several laws and regulations, it is noteworthy that women get decision-making power more often than men. Different state laws specify different circumstances and aspects to consider for the court when deciding on a child’s caregiver or custodian. However, one thing remains common in all the decisions that should be in the best interest of the child.

If the couples put rancour aside, most parents will agree that the decision should be made in the best interest of their child. If you are divorcing a man who is also a responsible father, then there are some considerations that the court uses for the decision-making decisions of a child and ways in which you can show your reliable parenting skills. Surely, your reliable and trustworthy family lawyer can be a better focal point and source of guidance under these circumstances.

Whether you are looking for sole or joint decision-making rights or simply generous visitation rights, you need to know the points that the court will take into consideration and allow the kids to be in contact with you.


Who Is The Primary Caregiver?


One of the most important and common factors used by the courts to determine the best person for the decision-making rights of the child is who was the primary caregiver of the child. Some states use the term "primary caregiver, " while others refer to it as the parent who can best understand and fulfill the needs of the child or the person who is willing and able to have the parenting responsibilities. The one who can care for the child in the best possible way.

Irrespective of the terms described above, the court considers the primary caregiver as the one responsible for most of the daily needs of the child; such as bathing, feeding, playing, waking and putting them to bed, arranging for child care, making appointments with the doctor, and so on. Nowadays, in most families, these activities are shared by both parents, and in some cases, stay-at-home dads even perform all the activities alone. However, even though women work full-time more than in the past, the chances of women being the primary caregiver are greater.

No matter how little involvement you have had in the above-mentioned tasks of your child, you should start taking responsibility and consider it a combined responsibility as a parent instead of stereotyping it as a gender role.

Start taking on these tasks as much as they make sense for you, your spouse, and your child. After all, you will be responsible for all these tasks after the divorce. So, the least you will gain by being involved in these tasks will be that you can develop a connection with your child. Moreover, when it comes to decision-making the court will consider the history of your involvement in these tasks.


Parent-Child Bond


Another consideration that the court takes into account when determining parenting time and decision-making determination is the bond between the parent and the child. Usually, the younger the child, the better the bond between the mother and the child. This aspect is not a reflection on the father but on the typical parenting practices that prevail in our society for young children.

A mother usually is the one feeding the child in the early life years of a toddler. The closeness in the process develops a strong bond between the mother and the child, and the level is very difficult for the father to achieve.

Moreover, women tend to take more time off than the father from work entirely for taking care of the child. Therefore, a child always first looks for a mother for their daily needs and emotional support.

As a father, try to get more involved as much as you can with your infant or toddler to develop a bond with them and make them at ease and emotionally attached to you. Once you start spending time with the child, you will no longer find it a responsibility but the best part of your life.




The court decides on parenting time and decision-making rights for the children of divorced couples based on various factors. The involvement of the child more with the mother often tilts the court’s decision towards the mother. Thus, the notion of mothers always getting the child’s support rights prevails despite laws providing equal opportunities for fathers to do so.

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